Fear Fear Fear
by To be the sky
Summary: In the mafia world, fear was a common feeling. And Reborn didn't know how to survive without fear anymore.


Angst r27 but I think I screwed the ending :(((( Sorry guyssss. But enjoy the story!

It was a single shot.

One shot from an assassin whose body was probably already incinerated as of now.

To say that Tsuna was horrified was an understatement of the century.

He couldn't believe that a single shot from one lucky assassin was able to cause so much damage to the one man he loved the most.

Reborn, the strongest hitman, now lay in a coma due to one special bullet to the abdomen. And the assassin hadn't even been aiming for Reborn. Tsuna was their target and Reborn had to protect him all because he was too useless and stupid to see it coming.

 _Useless. Useless. Useless._

The bullet used was a special flame bullet developed by an enemy famiglia, meant to attack the Vongola Decimo's strong and pure flames that would surely cripple him not only physically but mentally. Reborn being ex arcobaleno also had strong flames. But it seemed that arcobaleno flames were different from Vongola flames.

Tsuna clearly remembered the look on Reborn's face when the bullet hit: grimace at the pain of bullet piercing flesh, dizziness from blood loss and that was it. After that one could almost be fooled that Reborn was just asleep, with that peaceful look on his face save for the snot bubble now that Reborn was adult.

And then he had slipped into a coma.

All that bullshit about protecting family and getting stronger when he needed someone else to protect his pathetic arse.

"Tsunayoshi" a voice called out. The call of his name snapped him out of his self criticism. His guardians all had looks of concern on their faces with varying degrees. Everyone knew what happened, everyone knew what meant to him. Everyone knew how stupid he had been.

"It's not your fault." The voice continued. Tsuna looked towards the source of the voice: Mukuro and was surprised to see a somewhat sorrowful and… was it calculating look on his mist guardian's face.

As much as Tsuna wanted to believe Mukuro, he knew that ultimately he had been unable to protect and now there was nothing he could do to salvage the situation.

"There is a way to wake him up, you know." Mukuro spoke again. Tsuna's head snapped up.

If it had been a normal day, Tsuna would have been creeped out about the illusionist's mind reading abilities. But it was not a normal day, and Tsuna would have done anything to wake Reborn up, make him better.

 _Just let him be fine. Please._

Mukuro gave him a calculating look before continuing. "Many think that people in comatose are mentally unconscious, but actually what happens to them is that they are too deep in their mind to have a grasp on reality. In other words, you can say that they are lost in their own minds, wandering the endless hallways and unable to find a way out." Tsuna looked at Mukuro intently, willing him to continue.

With a sigh, Mukuro said, "I can open a way into his mind and someone can enter Reborn's mind to show him the way out, in other words, wake him up. But the person who does this can't be me, it has to be someone he loves dearly and cares deeply for or else his mind will reject the intrusion and the person attempting to enter will be lost in time space forever. For someone with a mind as strong as Reborn, the only person who can do that will be you, Tsunayoshi. "

As soon as he finished, protests erupted in the room.

"It's far too dangerous, Juudaime. Reborn-san is trained in such things, we can't risk you being rejected by Reborn-san!"

"Hayato is right, Tsuna. We should just wait for Reborn to wake up on his own, he is strong enough to do so, isn't he?"

"Tsuna-nii, forever is such a long time, don't go!"

Tsuna looked around at his guardians. "But I need him to wake up. Besides, I trusted Reborn with my life countless times, I trust him. He will let me in."

 _He will let me in. Just as he had with his heart time and time again._

With a small smile directed at his family, he motioned for Mukuro to begin. Warm mist flames swept over him, and the worried family of the tenth generation Vongola disappeared from his sight. Instead, countless hallways filled his vision. As expected of the mysterious Reborn. Even his mindscape was a maze.

Tsuna looked around, looking for hints that might help him locate the hitman. He wasn't sure what exactly should be done after he located the hitman but he supposed finding Reborn first couldn't be a wrong move. Hyper intuition told him to take one of the paths on the right. so Tsuna went right. And as he stepped through the path, images presented themselves.

 _Images of mostly made up of Tsuna, laughing, smiling, running away from something. Yet Tsuna could feel the warmth and happiness felt by Reborn that engulfed him as he stepped through image after image, the overwhelming love directed towards the himself in those pictures._

And then a familiar scene greeted him.

 _A sunny afternoon in Namimori. Stopping in front of the Sawada household and ringing the doorbell. Nana answered the door with her usual smile._

"It's mom…." Tsuna was puzzled.

 _And then it was Tsuna himself, stumbling down the stairs in all his 13 year old glory, seemingly yelling something that couldn't be made out_.

It was a familiar scene that tugged at Tsuna's heartstrings. Even though he had never witnessed himself reacting, Tsuna could tell that this was probably his first encounter with the hitman. "Seems like these are Reborn's memories…."

 _The scene ended, and the next one started. Around the table sat 6 other people._

 _Uneasiness, paranoia, confusion._

 _Those were the emotions Reborn was feeling. The meeting of the strongest seven, and the ultimate curse brought about to ensure the balance of the universe. It was his most hated memory, one he wishes to be rid of._

Tsuna frowned. It was the fated day where Reborn had been cursed to be an arcobaleno.

Further down the aisle, older memories came, filled with people he didn't recognize.

 _All those people killed. All those screams. All that blood._

Reborn's memories were filled with them.

 _And then came memories of his childhood._

 _Stealing._

 _Running._

 _Fear. Fear. Fear._

 _Fear of being caught. Fear of being killed._

 _And then,_

 _The fear of killing._

"It was probably Reborn's first kill", Tsuna realized in horror.

 _Reborn stared fearfully, the reality of what he had done only just sinking in. He hadn't thought much about it when a man approached him at the market back alley, asking him to complete a task which he would be rewarded heavily if succeeded. The money was good and Reborn had been starving for days. It didn't sink in when he accepted the job, didn't sink in when he tracked down the man. Not even when he pulled trigger of the gun aimed_ _at a dead shot at the man's head._

 _Now that it finally sunk in, Reborn felt fear. But also resignation. He really didn't know how to live without fear anymore._

Tsuna clenched his fists in anger. Reborn hadn't gone into the profession willingly. He didn't want to kill. Yet for the sake of survival, the mafia managed dragged a young child down into their dirty play and tainted his soul with fear. Tsuna wandered further down.

" _Please, spare us!"_

 _A woman with raven black hair knelt on the ground, pleading in earnest to a man holding a gun to her head. Her husband lay behind her, blood pooling around his body._

 _"I have a child, and he is still young, spare us, please!"_

 _There was a crib behind her and in the crib lay a baby boy with equally dark hair, eyes wide open, staring at the man with the gun. The man smirked and without a bat of the eyelash, he pulled the trigger._

 _A bang resonated through the room, and followed by that, the shrill sound of a baby's scream._

Tsuna bent over in shock. Tears rolling down his face, mouth opened in a soundless scream. A wave of pure fury crashed into him all at once, leaving him breathless and unsteady at the same time. People killed in cold blood. A baby orphaned, watched as his parents were gunned down, not being able to understand anything but only feeling a single emotion.

 _Fear. Fear. Fear._

"Dame-Tsuna."

Tsuna snapped up so quickly he almost bent his back in two. Standing in front of him was his original target, Reborn.

"Looks like you saw everything." Reborn said, with an uncharacteristic display of uncertainty and resignation.

"That… that baby…. Was it you?"

Reborn shrugged, attempting nonchalance. "Yeah." His voice broke with the single word.

Wordlessly, Tsuna got up and wrapped his arms around Reborn. Reborn made no intention to move, only continuing in a soft voice. "Fear was something I had always been familiar with since a young age. Do you know why I try so hard to keep at the top, to train myself to be the best? Because I don't want to be put it those situations again. I always thought being strong was being fearless and for a period of time, that was true." Tsuna didn't reply, quietly waiting for the hitman to continue.

"Until I met you." Tsuna's head snapped up to look at Reborn in shock.

But Reborn didn't seemed to be finished yet. "I met you and you were just so sincere and gentle in a way that no one has ever been to me before. Do you get it, Tsuna? I opened my heart to you because I fell in love with you completely. And then came an onslaught of fear. What if you left, what if you were injured, what if I couldn't protect you?"

"Is that why you threw yourself in front of a bullet for me?" Reborn made no response.

Tsuna pulled away from his one sided embrace and glared at Reborn.

"Don't you think that is selfish behaviour? I feel the same every time I have to send you or the guardians out on missions! It worries me sick that I am putting you guys in danger and I can't do anything about it! And then you go and throw yourself in front of a stupid bullet that wasn't even aiming for you and land yourself in this state. Do you have any idea how scared I was? I can't lose you either!"

And then his eyes softened and in a smaller voice, Tsuna added "You need to trust me, Reborn. You trained me yourself, you know I am strong and that I can protect myself. So you protect yourself too and we can both live with a little less fear that one of us is going to disappear from our sides at any moment. Ok?"

Reborn walked forward and with surprising tenderness, pulled Tsuna into a hug. Without needing to look, Tsuna could feel the warmth of the the hitman's tears seeping into his sleeve as Reborn finally allowed himself to feel and face all that fear from all those years.

"Well then, let's go home? Everyone is worried sick that you, of all people, are in comatose right now."

And with that, light engulfed both of them. Tsuna blinked blearily as the white walls of the infirmary came into focus. His guardians, save Hibari, were all crowded beside him anxiously.

"Juudaime! how are you feeling?" "A little dizzy, but I'm ok," Tsuna said as he tried to push off the many hands helping him to stand. "Did it work?"

"Hmm see for yourself."

Tsuna turned around and and saw Reborn sitting up in his bed. Slight smirk returned to his lips, looking very different from the version Tsuna met in his mind.

"Reborn…."

"Hmm dame-Tsuna, don't look at me like that."

The guardians seeing the Reborn was now awake, decided to give the couple a bit more space and left the room quietly.

Seeing that his guardians were gone, Tsuna turned to focus on Reborn. "You haven't answered my question."

Reborn sighed, "Tsuna, you don't seem to understand that you matter more to me than anything else."

Tsuna glared at him, a retort forming on his lips.

"But," Reborn interrupted with a loud voice. When Tsuna snapped his mouth shut with an audible click, he continued in a softer voice, "But I accept what you said and will try my best to do it."

Tsuna smiled, happy that Reborn finally listened to him for once.

"However that does not mean you can get off easy, dame-Tsuna. Not being able to sense such an obvious attack means you have not been trained enough. When I get better, prepare for the most intense training ever. Lover or not I am still your tutor and will have to make sure you live up to the reputation of Vongola."

"But Reborrnnnnnn!" Tsuna whined, thinking of torture he would have to put up with after Reborn recovered.

 _But… I wouldn't have it any other way._

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